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My Cooking: A Catastrophe by Any Other Name (with apologies to William Shakespeare)

Arthur Heffelfinger

Hello again!

I hope all of you are enjoying a lovely autumn season.  As I wrote in an earlier column, the global warming of our planet has created some truly horrific weather this past year, but I  hope you have been able to avoid such catastrophes.

 Now, there’s an interesting word: “catastrophe.”  Obviously, catastrophes are not good, but exactly how BAD do circumstances have to be to warrant the use of this term?

Like many other issues of English usage, the answer is: “It depends.”  Actually, in the case of “catastrophe,” there are really only two circumstances you need to consider before using this word:

 1.     How relatively bad is the current situation when compared to all other possible outcomes of the same circumstance.  For example, if there is a fire in my house, it certainly wouldn’t be a good thing.  However, if the fire is in a small pan on my kitchen stove (and I extinguish it by placing a lid over the pan), this really can’t be called a “catastrophe.”   On the other hand, if I’m an idiot and throw water on the pan, the fire could spatter upward, engulf the kitchen, and burn down the entire house – truly a catastrophe!

                                                                     


2.     How important is the problem.  As my wife will tell you, my cooking is not so good!  As a matter of fact, she has often said, “Your cooking is a catastrophe.  OK, I admit I should never open a restaurant, but is “catastrophe” really an appropriate expression here?  My cooking might make things inconvenient because we need to trash our dinner and travel to MacDonalds, but the fact is no one was poisoned by my efforts.  THAT would have been truly catastrophic!  In other words, my cooking may be the absolute worst (relatively very bad - see #1 above), but the situation isn’t really a "catastrophe" because the entire issue is not so important!

                                                                    


Choosing the appropriate English word can sometimes be tricky, but I can certainly help.  I invite you to enroll in my free English Counseling Lesson to learn more.

Have a great autumn, and I’ll see you next month.

 Art

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This column was published by the author in their personal capacity.
The opinions expressed in this column are the author's own and do not reflect the view of Cafetalk.

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