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Throughout this series, we have explored the Inner Judge.
Not as something to fight,
but as something to understand.
We saw how it appears in daily life.
We traced where it came from.
We recognized that it once served a purpose.
Now, a quiet question may be arising:
If I stop judging myself, what remains?
Many people imagine that letting go of self-judgment means
becoming confident, fearless, or unshakable.
But self-trust does not begin there.
It begins much earlier —
and much smaller.
Self-judgment is a way of living that relies on constant evaluation.
Am I doing enough?
Am I acceptable?
Am I falling behind?
Self-trust is different.
It does not eliminate uncertainty.
It changes how we relate to it.
One of the most important things to understand is this:
Self-trust cannot be forced.
Trying to “fix” yourself often comes from the same system
that created the Inner Judge in the first place.
Effort, pressure, and self-improvement can quietly become
another form of judgment.
So instead of asking,
“How do I change myself?”
You might ask,
“What happens if I stop pushing?”
This is not resignation.
It is a shift in direction.
For many people, self-trust begins with something very simple:
A small “no.”
Not a dramatic boundary.
Not a confrontation.
Just a quiet refusal to abandon yourself.
You may notice it when your body feels tired,
but your mind says you should continue.
You may notice it when you agree too quickly,
before checking how you actually feel.
Choosing a small “no” is not selfish.
It is a way of listening.
Each time you listen, something subtle changes.
Your system learns:
“I am allowed to exist as I am.”
Self-trust is not an idea.
It is not a belief you repeat.
It is a bodily sense of permission.
Permission to rest.
Permission to be uncertain.
Permission to not perform.
This is why nothing dramatic may seem to happen at first.
But slowly, the nervous system relaxes.
The Inner Judge does not disappear —
but it no longer runs the entire system.
Many of us were taught, implicitly or explicitly,
to look outside ourselves for guidance.
Approval.
Rules.
Correct answers.
But there comes a point when healing means
becoming your own reference point.
This does not mean isolation.
It means inner orientation.
In Buddhist terms, this is sometimes called being your own light.
Not because you know everything —
but because you trust your capacity to meet what arises.
As judgment loosens its grip,
life often becomes simpler.
Not easier —
but clearer.
You may still feel fear.
You may still hesitate.
But those experiences are no longer proof of failure.
They are part of being alive.
And that recognition itself is stabilizing.
If you have read this far,
something in you is already shifting.
Not because you tried harder,
but because you noticed.
Awareness is not passive.
It is transformative in a quiet way.
You do not need to arrive anywhere.
You do not need to become someone else.
Trust grows the moment you stop turning against yourself.
And from that place,
a different way of living begins —
naturally.
This is not an ending.
It is a return.
＊This is Part 4 of a series exploring self-judgment and inner awareness.
If you enjoyed this article, please give it a few claps!??
— Yuki, Qigong Practitioner at Empower Labo Zen Japan
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